Well I think I was delusional. You know when I thought to myself, having a puppy can't be that much work. Well it is. Mostly because I am trying to teach this little monkey to use only one area of the yard, and that is much easier said than done, apparently. She lets some out where I want her to, and then she trots off when I let her off the leash, and deposits some more wherever she can. This is driving me bonkers. I want to just let her poop wherever the hell she likes, I am so done with it, but I promised my darling husband that I would do this, and apparently that fucking contract is binding for life. Fuck me.
She is a little sweetie though, and has got her name figured out and some of the other nuances of her little life. The kids just love her to pieces, and spend lots of time playing with her. Of course, they are returning to school on Thursday, and I am very much looking forward to that. They have become bored and belligerent, and they spend a lot of time fighting with one another, so I'm done. I need them gone, and we can all get a new routine going again. I feel a bit insane this past week, and if you knew how I am, that means completely f-ing bonkers!
My daughter, the chronic pooh holder, is at it again, even though I have her on all sorts of natural healthy stuff to keep things going, and so she resists and is getting more and more crazy with the whole thing as the days pass. she gets so agitated and emotional when she does this, and it escalates and escalates until she is in pain and has chronic heartburn and is completely plugged again. ARGH! It is so frustrating. It is a total control thing with her and I try so many different strategies with her, and none really work long term. I am afraid she'll be so plugged by Thursday that she will be crazy and manic and out of control her first day of grade 1. Time for some chocolate ex lax perhaps?? Damn it all.
Because school is starting again, I am going to try to change some of my work hours again and hopefully work a couple of day shifts and only one evening, but I have a new boss now, so we shall see if it all pans out as I wish it to. I'm a bit spoiled at my job, I just say when I want to work and they say ok, but I'm not sure if this new guy will be as accommodating. Then all of the sports and volunteering can start again, and I will feel like I'm losing my mind again. I try to tell myself to relax and be in the moment more instead of stressing and rushing but it's hard for me to do. I need to start some yoga and some zen breathing or something before my head explodes. Who's got friggin time tho? One more day, one more day, and then I can make some time for me.............................where's some cold beer?
As you can see, I am overwhelmed and counting the minutes until I can have some peace and quiet, and hopefully more poop in all the places I need it to be. Oh and beer of course.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
It's all new to me......
Well first I got some new bedding........
And then I got me a new puppy!
And then I finally took the 5 minutes required to figure out how to download pictures off my camera so I could post them. I took some video with the camera, which I also just figured out how to do, but wasn't sure how to post the video off of it without some sort of software or some crap like that, and I am now in arrested technical development!! I will need assistance from Chunks or maybe hubby for that one, as he is the pc police in our house. Saves us all a lot of grief in the long run really.
Puppy girl Casey is doing great and keeping us all busy and entertained. She went the whole night last night, from 11 until 6:30 before she needed to pee/poop so I was totally impressed!! She is very smart and sweet and I already love her to total pieces!!!!
OH MY GOD, she just asked the kids to let her out by whining at the door!! She is so damn smart, just barely 8 weeks old, only 4 days in our house and already asking to go outside, I am so jazzed!!!! Awesome!
Gotta go clean up some crap now(literally!). Have an awesome day all, and we'll post some vid of the new pup soon!
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Canadian loons and all that stuff....
Wow, it's been a week already....I'm not so hot at the regular gig. I'm sporadic at best.
I feel like we are trying to cram as much into this last bit of summer as possible. School starts in less than 3 weeks and the weather has cooled considerably so it's starting to feel like fall is on its way. EEK! I am hoping we'll still have another stretch of warm days but who knows up here in hinterland.
Remember those Canadian vignettes they did in the 70's? It was some Canadian heritage thing, I think it was "Hinterland who's who?" or something, and it was these little educational vignettes about our country, our native animals, and our landscapes. For some reason, it's been on my mind lately. I remember it fondly. Now people need to have all this flash and bling and sarcasm in order to be entertained that it must seem near impossible to engage people on our earth and all it's beauty short of trying to scare the living shit out of them. I don't really think that works either though. People resent it. I want the vignettes again. Simpler times. Maybe that's my whole Laura Ingalls books fascination thing as well. Totally love the idea of simpler times, living off what you could find, settling where you landed. I am a big wimp so I doubt I could handle it at all, but it is a romantical notion I hold dear.
I pick up the little baby ball of fluff this coming Friday so I got my gear and am doing my final prep this week. We are excited to say the least. I know it will be tons of work but I'm hoping I can handle the lack of sleep, it's been almost six years since I had a baby in the house so we shall see. Like I say, I am a wimp. Need to sleep, pooh regularly, have my allergies under control, have enough down time, eat regularly, all that stuff, or I am one cranky gal. Should be interesting to say the least. Hopefully she'll be like my little gal and be a great sleeper. Pray for me. I did survive a non sleeping colicky baby though, so I should be good to go I'm thinking. Either that or me head is firmly planted in me arse!!
We saw some old friends today, it's been several years since we saw them. They live one and a half hours away from us and they had to come to town so we spent the afternoon and evening just visiting and letting the kids play and get acquainted so it was really nice. We need to make an effort to go see them and keep it up, they're too close to not make the trip. They like to camp so I am hoping the more I expose my anti-camping husband to them the faster I can wear him down!!! Yesterday we spent the day in the mountains with some other friends at their camp site and it was a perfect gorgeous day!! We had a great time in that amazing mountain air and spent the whole day outside which was so great! Hubby and his pal overindulged a bit so I drove us all home in the wee hours but it was a really fun day. Until poor hubby woke up with a headache that is. I teased him all day since he never drinks and it is so funny to see him like that when he does. He's really funny anyways, and then get the guy drunk and it's quite cute.
Fun times!
I have another very busy week ahead between work and appointments and planned activities so it may be another week before I post again. Time is flying!!!! Yikes. I am trying to savor all of it and not let myself get too anxious about the pace and the timing and live in the moment a bit more. I'm not always very successful with that since I am a bit of a spaz but it's all a work in progress. Haha, fucking understatement but whatever!
Ciao babies, have a great one.
I feel like we are trying to cram as much into this last bit of summer as possible. School starts in less than 3 weeks and the weather has cooled considerably so it's starting to feel like fall is on its way. EEK! I am hoping we'll still have another stretch of warm days but who knows up here in hinterland.
Remember those Canadian vignettes they did in the 70's? It was some Canadian heritage thing, I think it was "Hinterland who's who?" or something, and it was these little educational vignettes about our country, our native animals, and our landscapes. For some reason, it's been on my mind lately. I remember it fondly. Now people need to have all this flash and bling and sarcasm in order to be entertained that it must seem near impossible to engage people on our earth and all it's beauty short of trying to scare the living shit out of them. I don't really think that works either though. People resent it. I want the vignettes again. Simpler times. Maybe that's my whole Laura Ingalls books fascination thing as well. Totally love the idea of simpler times, living off what you could find, settling where you landed. I am a big wimp so I doubt I could handle it at all, but it is a romantical notion I hold dear.
I pick up the little baby ball of fluff this coming Friday so I got my gear and am doing my final prep this week. We are excited to say the least. I know it will be tons of work but I'm hoping I can handle the lack of sleep, it's been almost six years since I had a baby in the house so we shall see. Like I say, I am a wimp. Need to sleep, pooh regularly, have my allergies under control, have enough down time, eat regularly, all that stuff, or I am one cranky gal. Should be interesting to say the least. Hopefully she'll be like my little gal and be a great sleeper. Pray for me. I did survive a non sleeping colicky baby though, so I should be good to go I'm thinking. Either that or me head is firmly planted in me arse!!
We saw some old friends today, it's been several years since we saw them. They live one and a half hours away from us and they had to come to town so we spent the afternoon and evening just visiting and letting the kids play and get acquainted so it was really nice. We need to make an effort to go see them and keep it up, they're too close to not make the trip. They like to camp so I am hoping the more I expose my anti-camping husband to them the faster I can wear him down!!! Yesterday we spent the day in the mountains with some other friends at their camp site and it was a perfect gorgeous day!! We had a great time in that amazing mountain air and spent the whole day outside which was so great! Hubby and his pal overindulged a bit so I drove us all home in the wee hours but it was a really fun day. Until poor hubby woke up with a headache that is. I teased him all day since he never drinks and it is so funny to see him like that when he does. He's really funny anyways, and then get the guy drunk and it's quite cute.
Fun times!
I have another very busy week ahead between work and appointments and planned activities so it may be another week before I post again. Time is flying!!!! Yikes. I am trying to savor all of it and not let myself get too anxious about the pace and the timing and live in the moment a bit more. I'm not always very successful with that since I am a bit of a spaz but it's all a work in progress. Haha, fucking understatement but whatever!
Ciao babies, have a great one.
Sunday, August 5, 2007
I'm Back.
MIL left yesterday morning. I think I survived. I am all in one piece, maybe even a tad wistful. It wasn't easy for me, and she and I were both crunchy for a few days each, but we steered clear and I thought a lot about what was bothering me in the moment and why. Last night, when she got home, she called and asked to speak to me, which NEVER happens, and it was to say a proper goodbye as she hadn't done so prior and to thank me for having her, so I felt soft after that, and shed a tear. I am a silly fool about relationships all my life, and lament my and certain other's inability to connect meaningfully. I then periodically try to accept and mourn the loss. I am an odd duck I suppose. Or maybe not.
We had other guests as well. Friends from where we lived prior to moving back to Alberta. Great family, one of the gems we found there that made my loneliness in that cold sea of people more bearable. They stayed the night and most of the next day on their way home from little dude's visit at his mom's in GP. It was nice, but I was relieved to have my house back after the marathon with MIL and all the activity of late. Ever since, I have been cranky and all backwards in my body and spirit. Hmph. I am such a delicate flower, apparently, and am annoyed with myself for it. I am just annoyed in general really.
I worked today most of the day,which was probably better for my family and was certainly a welcome break from all their neediness. I am hoping hubby's return to work tomorrow will provide me with more peace and quiet and I can get my head sorted out again. I was pleased that he took the time and effort to speak with his mom prior to their arrival about what was and was not acceptable for us in our home and validating my feelings to her. It is never too little too late with me, and I felt relief that he finally gave that to us, to me. She said some things that surprised me as well so I have some things to think about.
So thank you all for your thoughts while I have been toiling in the zone over here, and I have to say I did manage to get on and at least read most nights so I maintained some sanity that way. I realized just recently that the blogging is a way for me to be alone even if the house is full of people and it is a valuable tool in that way.
All this weekend, it was our local Rodeo and Heritage Days so it was 5 days of midway, rodeo, trade fair, and a little fireworks. It ended today. We spent some time there on Saturday and it was fun. Everyone else went home after a bit and me and little gal stayed and hung out together which was a really nice treat for both of us. She is such a sweet and funny little person, with this tender little heart. It is always easy with her, even when it's not. I get her. I find much greater challenges with my son, I don't always relate to his inner workings, and it makes it a lot trickier for me to find my way with him. This frustrated me a lot the past couple of days, and I was cranky with him, so I feel unsuccessful as a parent today. Blahhh! I know that is just normal and all that but I am tired.
Goodnight all you lovelies, I must take my crusty old self to bed now.
We had other guests as well. Friends from where we lived prior to moving back to Alberta. Great family, one of the gems we found there that made my loneliness in that cold sea of people more bearable. They stayed the night and most of the next day on their way home from little dude's visit at his mom's in GP. It was nice, but I was relieved to have my house back after the marathon with MIL and all the activity of late. Ever since, I have been cranky and all backwards in my body and spirit. Hmph. I am such a delicate flower, apparently, and am annoyed with myself for it. I am just annoyed in general really.
I worked today most of the day,which was probably better for my family and was certainly a welcome break from all their neediness. I am hoping hubby's return to work tomorrow will provide me with more peace and quiet and I can get my head sorted out again. I was pleased that he took the time and effort to speak with his mom prior to their arrival about what was and was not acceptable for us in our home and validating my feelings to her. It is never too little too late with me, and I felt relief that he finally gave that to us, to me. She said some things that surprised me as well so I have some things to think about.
So thank you all for your thoughts while I have been toiling in the zone over here, and I have to say I did manage to get on and at least read most nights so I maintained some sanity that way. I realized just recently that the blogging is a way for me to be alone even if the house is full of people and it is a valuable tool in that way.
All this weekend, it was our local Rodeo and Heritage Days so it was 5 days of midway, rodeo, trade fair, and a little fireworks. It ended today. We spent some time there on Saturday and it was fun. Everyone else went home after a bit and me and little gal stayed and hung out together which was a really nice treat for both of us. She is such a sweet and funny little person, with this tender little heart. It is always easy with her, even when it's not. I get her. I find much greater challenges with my son, I don't always relate to his inner workings, and it makes it a lot trickier for me to find my way with him. This frustrated me a lot the past couple of days, and I was cranky with him, so I feel unsuccessful as a parent today. Blahhh! I know that is just normal and all that but I am tired.
Goodnight all you lovelies, I must take my crusty old self to bed now.
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