Holy crap.
I have PMS. It's a cranky time, but not a psycho cranky time so I can't really complain.
My life is so busy and will be for the next couple of weeks as I'm covering holidays for someone so am working more than I really wish to. I am having a really hard time finding time to go to that gym I joined and it's rankling me because the desire is there, but the means is not. I'm going to a yoga class in the morning though and I hear you have to get there early to get a spot on the floor so I hope I make it in.
My kids are so excited about the massive sugar blast tomorrow! They party and binge all day at school so they're good and fucked up before you even get them home. Then you try to force some broccoli into them and clean the crumbs and drool off their wrinkled costumes and forge out into the cold to fill bags and buckets full of tooth decaying crap. WOOHOO! What a party it is though. I remember how fun it was for us and I get it, but as a parent it feels a bit obscene to me. haha.
A woman I work with just found out her 31 year old SIL who has a 1 year old baby has terminal cancer. Fuck. That is so not fair. I know she also lost her mother to cancer so this is just so not cool. I didn't know what to say to her and I didn't want to make her cry. It's fucking awful. Damn cancer anyways.
We were talking today about all this crap talk about how our premier is upping the oil and gas royalties in our province, and now all the oil and gas people are fucking crying about it and saying they'll have to leave so they can make money, and we better be careful what we support because our costs will increase if it happens, blah fucking blah. I call bullshit first off. So they make a few million less, they still make a fuck of a lot of money so boo hoo. And also, maybe if they want to go elsewhere, they should. Then maybe we can support some alternative energy sources that won't vaporize the damn planet and they can lose their friggin monopoly and we can call it a success. I don't buy that propaganda that starts up every time big business thinks their bottom line is going to suffer, and all of a sudden the damn sky is falling. WHAT-EVER!
I wish people in this province would pull their greedy heads out of their asses sometimes.
Rant over. Whew, I feel better now.
Caio babies.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
I love annie
I know, I know. I have not changed religions, not that I had one to begin with. I am not anti-blogging, I am not sad, I am not injured, I am just so friggin busy that I barely have time to pee. Other that life being super busy lately, I am doing great, for all of those who care. And I thank you for caring, I really do. :)
After I returned from my wonderful beautiful weekend of quiet, I fell headfirst into planning a party, working too much, catching up on housework, volunteer duties at the school, and both kids starting their respective winter activities. My son is playing hockey for the first time this year and is totally loving it, but it is a bit of a time hog, so it's all another schedule juggle in our busy lives. We spend last weekend getting a playground built at the school so it's just been super hectic. Thank God for the drugs. And I mean that whole heartedly!!!
I feel like the me I was supposed to be all these years. I have little to no anxiety at all, I am able to get angry and then drop it without flying into a red rage, I am not paranoid about others and what they think of me anymore. I can still laugh, likely more than I did before, and I can still cry so it's not like I've flattened out. I wish I had done it 20 years ago, I really do. I suffered for no good reason and I am so happy I finally admitted that I needed help. Wow. I am now feeling like I am the person I have always strived to be. I don't panic at the mere thought of vulnerability or opening up too much. It is just so great and I see the difference already in my family because of it.
I have had two horribly obnoxious and nasty colds in the past month and a half so I am hoping the snot is all done with until the New Year! I lost my voice for almost an entire week and that was hard for me, but I think my kids loved it-haha!
Today I did the recycling pickups and then went with the car to the give and take at our local depot. I found some goodies and I was struggling to get them into my little car to no avail. This older couple pulled up beside me and asked where I lived cuz they wanted to load up my stuff and drive it home for me. How freaking cool is that?? Before, I would have felt like crying accepting such a nice gesture and then felt anxious about accepting and a whole myriad of crap. Today I felt overjoyed and buoyant and thankful and that was all. It is magnificent!! I got a solid wood sideboard with sliding doors and a lovely little drawing desk on casters for the kids. Both are solid wood and in great shape and will look awesome after a nice coat of paint. SCORE!! Life is good today, I'm tellin' ya. Now I am heading back to pick up a nice white door I saw there that I am going to put legs on and use as a craft/art table so I can have my supplies at the ready and organized!!! I am cranked up on all this today!!
I have been listening to the new Annie Lennox cd all morning and it is pure gold, absolutely beautiful and full of loveliness. All the sisters and maybe even some of the brothers need to listen to this one, it is worth every cent I spent buying it in hard copy.
The sun is shining, and this day is rolled out before me. Have a great one everyone!
After I returned from my wonderful beautiful weekend of quiet, I fell headfirst into planning a party, working too much, catching up on housework, volunteer duties at the school, and both kids starting their respective winter activities. My son is playing hockey for the first time this year and is totally loving it, but it is a bit of a time hog, so it's all another schedule juggle in our busy lives. We spend last weekend getting a playground built at the school so it's just been super hectic. Thank God for the drugs. And I mean that whole heartedly!!!
I feel like the me I was supposed to be all these years. I have little to no anxiety at all, I am able to get angry and then drop it without flying into a red rage, I am not paranoid about others and what they think of me anymore. I can still laugh, likely more than I did before, and I can still cry so it's not like I've flattened out. I wish I had done it 20 years ago, I really do. I suffered for no good reason and I am so happy I finally admitted that I needed help. Wow. I am now feeling like I am the person I have always strived to be. I don't panic at the mere thought of vulnerability or opening up too much. It is just so great and I see the difference already in my family because of it.
I have had two horribly obnoxious and nasty colds in the past month and a half so I am hoping the snot is all done with until the New Year! I lost my voice for almost an entire week and that was hard for me, but I think my kids loved it-haha!
Today I did the recycling pickups and then went with the car to the give and take at our local depot. I found some goodies and I was struggling to get them into my little car to no avail. This older couple pulled up beside me and asked where I lived cuz they wanted to load up my stuff and drive it home for me. How freaking cool is that?? Before, I would have felt like crying accepting such a nice gesture and then felt anxious about accepting and a whole myriad of crap. Today I felt overjoyed and buoyant and thankful and that was all. It is magnificent!! I got a solid wood sideboard with sliding doors and a lovely little drawing desk on casters for the kids. Both are solid wood and in great shape and will look awesome after a nice coat of paint. SCORE!! Life is good today, I'm tellin' ya. Now I am heading back to pick up a nice white door I saw there that I am going to put legs on and use as a craft/art table so I can have my supplies at the ready and organized!!! I am cranked up on all this today!!
I have been listening to the new Annie Lennox cd all morning and it is pure gold, absolutely beautiful and full of loveliness. All the sisters and maybe even some of the brothers need to listen to this one, it is worth every cent I spent buying it in hard copy.
The sun is shining, and this day is rolled out before me. Have a great one everyone!
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
The weekend was sooooo relaxing. Who knew I could sleep so much if left to my own devices? I didn't draw as much as I had thought I would, but I wrote, read, took copious amounts of photos, and shopped to my heart's desire, mostly just browsing, but it was so relaxing to just do whatever I wanted and not be on a schedule at all.
I left late Friday and headed north on a scenic secondary highway, stopping a lot along the way to take pics, and change my music. I ended up in Lacombe, which is a small town of about 10000, and has a lot of historic buildings and is very quaint and pretty. I found a B & B on a farm west of town, run by a couple who are originally from Holland, as so many of the farmers in the area are. I had a comfy little room and my own bathroom, and a main sitting area for all guests to use. The only other people there were fresh off the plane from Holland, in Canada for a month of touring, and spoke very little English, but were very nice and we attempted some conversation, which was fun for me.
I slept over 10 hours the first night. When I woke up, I looked out the window at the trees all around and saw a horse outside of the window, the sun shining over the whole thing, with a shine of morning dew. It was so peaceful and pretty, exactly what I wanted to wake up to. After a huge yummy breakfast, I headed out with camera and sketchbook for a long walk down the country roads and some picture taking and sketching, and came back to sit and draw. It didn't take long before I was asleep again, for about 3 hours!!! After that, I headed into town and toured about, and the rest of my trip was more of the same, shopping, resting, writing, sleeping, eating, all good.
I came home feeling so rested and relaxed and I thought to myself, this needs to become a yearly tradition for me. So damn good to be with just yourself sometimes.
I'll try to get some pics downloaded and posted in the next few days, it's back to real life and my sometimes crazy schedule.
Hope you all had a great weekend too. I got the new Joni Mitchell cd for my journey, it is really sad and thoughtful and a great listen. I also finally picked up Amy Winehouse, and it is also a great listen, that girl can sing.
Peace out people.
I left late Friday and headed north on a scenic secondary highway, stopping a lot along the way to take pics, and change my music. I ended up in Lacombe, which is a small town of about 10000, and has a lot of historic buildings and is very quaint and pretty. I found a B & B on a farm west of town, run by a couple who are originally from Holland, as so many of the farmers in the area are. I had a comfy little room and my own bathroom, and a main sitting area for all guests to use. The only other people there were fresh off the plane from Holland, in Canada for a month of touring, and spoke very little English, but were very nice and we attempted some conversation, which was fun for me.
I slept over 10 hours the first night. When I woke up, I looked out the window at the trees all around and saw a horse outside of the window, the sun shining over the whole thing, with a shine of morning dew. It was so peaceful and pretty, exactly what I wanted to wake up to. After a huge yummy breakfast, I headed out with camera and sketchbook for a long walk down the country roads and some picture taking and sketching, and came back to sit and draw. It didn't take long before I was asleep again, for about 3 hours!!! After that, I headed into town and toured about, and the rest of my trip was more of the same, shopping, resting, writing, sleeping, eating, all good.
I came home feeling so rested and relaxed and I thought to myself, this needs to become a yearly tradition for me. So damn good to be with just yourself sometimes.
I'll try to get some pics downloaded and posted in the next few days, it's back to real life and my sometimes crazy schedule.
Hope you all had a great weekend too. I got the new Joni Mitchell cd for my journey, it is really sad and thoughtful and a great listen. I also finally picked up Amy Winehouse, and it is also a great listen, that girl can sing.
Peace out people.
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